This is the fourth blog of the seven-part series of “7 habits of highly effec­tive teh tarik kakis”.

[To have a bet­ter under­stand­ing of what is “teh tarik”, “teh tarik kaki” or “teh tarik ses­sion’, please go to the About page.]

Com­ing back to the 4th habit of highly effec­tive Ah Bengs, it is “long chong ai yarh (want to win in everything)”. How­ever for Teh Tarik Kakis, it should be like this:


Do you waste time in a teh tarik session?

How many of us go for yum cha (teh tarik) session just to gossip away our time, chit chat away our teh tarik money? Unless you have plenty of time and money, the better approach is to make sure your yum cha session is of “I Win-You Win-He/She win” situation.

For example, you meet to explore a business deal or opportunity, ask yourself whether your meeting with your kaki benefit him/her and yourself? If it only benefits one party, think twice because nobody likes to be taken advantage. Best still the yum cha session should benefit the third party, i.e. WIN-WIN-WIN situation!

So never take advantage of your teh tarik kaki, always do something to benefit him/her during a teh tarik session, and if possible it also benefits the third party.

It is like bargaining a price between a seller and buyer. The buyer always wants to sell at the highest price and buyer wants to buy at the lowest price possible. It make no sense if a teh tarik session only benefit one party and while the other party is in the losing end. Therefore it is advisable to NOT only take you must also GIVE in return.

A win-win or win-win-win situation is something more mutually beneficial to all parties. Teh tarik kakis must bear in mind in all yum cha sessions to look out for the third alternative, i.e. the better way.  Mind sets like

  • Lose/Lose
  • Win/Lose
  • Win
  • Lose/Win
  • No deal

should be discarded. It is all in the mind. When we go to a teh tarik session with a mindset of other than win-win (or win-win-win), most probably the outcome will be one of the above scenarios.

Tips to achieve a Win-Win or Win-Win-Win situation

  1. Always look at things from different angles and put yourself into other people’s shoes
  2. Find out what is the MOST important issues/bottlenecks
  3. Brainstorm to get the best available solution
  4. Are there any other options available?

That’s all for Habit #4. Stay tuned for Habit #5!

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